Thursday, July 10, 2008

Four things I don't want to hear...

1. "You're getting so close!"

2. "You should sleep now because it might be a long time before you sleep again."

3. "You look like you're about to pop."

4. "You shouldn't be (insert any number of things here... running, lifting anything, climbing stairs, walking a long way...)
It seems like one of these four things inevitably comes out of almost every person's mouth that I encounter these days. And hearing them does not make me excited nor want to have a baby. It is not that I am oblivious to the demands and changes that come with a newborn... I just don't want to keep thinking about all the negative parts because, frankly, I want to focus on the good stuff so I don't get too freaked out.

So here is what I have to say to each of those things...

1. Getting close? Yes, but please don't remind me that I am only 3 weeks away from my due date, which means as of this Saturday I am considered full term which also means I could potentially have this baby any day in the next 5 weeks. I am not nearly ready mentally for the labor nor are all the planned projects done around the house. I also don't have a wide variety of so-called "necessary" baby products. I do not have my hospital bag packed and I am still going to work everyday. I plan to keep going to work every day unless something dramatic happens. So telling me I am close only causes me greater anxiety. Not to mention the fact that the labor and delivery part of this whole deal weighs heavily on my mind (and my pelvis). Reminding me that I am about to have the most painful experience of my life and that I should be excited about it doesn't help me. Please don't say it.

2. Sleep is a precious thing. I am not one of those people who requires a full 8+ hours of sleep every night, but when I don't get sufficient sleep, I can be pretty raunchy. Couple that with no working out, and I am a downright beast. Not a very good combination. I am afraid of the inner hulk that may emerge post baby since I won't be able to exercise for a couple of weeks, there will be a baby to take care of and figure out, and I probably won't be sleeping as much as I would like. This is not one of those parts of motherhood that women find joy over. Constantly bringing it up makes me forget all the good things about motherhood. The few weeks prior to labor and delivery are a time of increased anxiety and uncertainty, especially when it's your first... no one needs help feeling more anxious.

3. Yes, I am bigger than I have ever been, but compared to a lot of people I am not that big. Yes, I am uncomfortable, but again... please do not remind me of it. If I focus on other things, I can forget for a while about the discomfort and the fact I am sticking out in places I have never stuck out and that I have gained more weight in the last 3 months than I have ever in my life. Telling me I look like I am about to pop is about the same as telling someone they look pasty, overweight and slightly unattractive.

4. I am a healthy pregnant woman, not an invalid. While I refrain from lifting too many heavy things, carrying my groceries, climbing the stairs to my apartment and walking home from work are not necessarily strenuous activities that should be avoided. As far as running is concerned, my doctor says it is fine and at this point can only help me. This is not 1950 and pregnant women are encouraged to exercise.

And with that... I leave you with a 37 week shot.

11 comments:

Tris & Ken said...

You are perhaps the best lookin' pregnant lady I've ever seen! Not dramatizing... You look great!! And not one worry about delivery or post-baby. You won't have any troubles with delivery-- you are in great shape, you will just pop him out!! Seriously, it's not that bad (at least it's easy to forget afterwards). We're all grumpy for a while after baby, but you will feel so in love that it is worth it. Plus you will probably be surprised how quickly you will be out there with a jogging stroller getting your exercise again. Wow!! I'm so excited for you! Good luck with your projects and the waiting game!!

Aaron, Lindsey, and Zander said...

You look awesome! I definitely wouldn't say you looked ready to pop! I know I'm strange, but labor was an awesome experience. Although, I do have anxiety, even about doing it a second time, I can't wait to do it again! You are going to do great seeing as you are in great shape!! Good luck, and I can't wait to hear how it all goes, and see the little man!

Kristyn said...

As they have said above -- you look amazing! Its crazy to me how people feel they can say anything to a pregnant woman - there were so many times I had to smile and nod when I really just wanted to smack people upside the head! As for the sleep thing -- don't stress it -- you get interrupted sleep, but you still get sleep. And the best part is you forget ALL of these things that are making you anxious right now REALLY quickly -- otherwise there would be a lot of only children running around. None of it is nearly as bad as you make it out to be in your head (I know, our brains work alike and I've been through to the other side of this experience)!! Keep us posted and take care of yourself (however you best see fit) =)

Cafe Johnsonia said...

Um, yeah...I'm one of the people who have told you to sleep while you can. Sorry. :)

It's funny how you think you know what to expect--even now that we're on number 3. Each time it has blown my mind how different things were than people said. (I mean this in a good way--like, don't listen to anyone else and what they have to say!)

We can't wait to meet the Nairn. And you do look great!

Melissa C said...

You look so awesome! I totally agree with your whole entry! I have been getting the "looking close" comments, and am so far behind you that it makes me want to cry, because I am no where NEAR close, and it will be really bad if I don't last at LEAST another 8 weeks from now. I think it is because I am so short, I look more pregnant that I am. Do take advantage of people helping you, though, if they are so concerned you will hurt yourself that they will do it for you!

Sarah said...

I think you look beautiful! And, oh, how I can relate to everything you wrote. So true! So true! I even had women telling me horror stories of their labors just days before I went into the hospital, which really didn't help me out because like you I had a lot of anxiety. Honestly, everything is going to be fine! You'll be great!

Nicole Cave said...

I think it is great if you are running. I never felt like doing that...so you must be feeling good. As for the labor we can all tell you different things but you will get to experience it yourself and have your own opinion. Just let me say this...it is one of the only things that has made me feel so extremely close to our father in heaven and to Ashton. I think it is a wonderful experience and a blessing! You'll do great!!

Rebecca said...

You look great. I looked over at you in church yesterday and thought about how small you are carrying. And I officially promise to never ask you about or refer to your "condition" again. I'll ask you how running is going instead.

Tamara said...

I think that you look just amazing and I am sorry because I think I said one of those things to you yesterday;)

familia Bybaran said...

The worst one for me was: it looks like you are carrying a girl. Every old wive's tale I ever read said that people who carry girls carry them "everywhere" and their faces bloat and their noses get big and their hair gets coarse and they get acne and all sorts of things. I just don't know what would compel someone to say that to me.

I agree with the above. You look amazing and it's all very exciting.

Ann said...

You look amazing! And don't you worry--everything will be great!